Is It Wrong To Have Fantasies

If you think you’re the only one who has sexual fantasies, think again. You’re actually in the vast majority. A whopping 97% of people regularly indulge in a little steamy daydreaming, and yep, that’s totally normal. But here’s the kicker: only 3% of people say they don’t have any sexual fantasies at all. Yep, 3%. So, if you're part of that group, you're probably wondering, “What’s going on here?”

Let’s break it down, shall we?

According to Justin Lehmiller, PhD, a research fellow at The Kinsey Institute and author of Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life, about 97% of people engage in sexual fantasies. And no, it’s not just the occasional random thought—we’re talking multiple times a week, sometimes even multiple times a day. It's natural, and it happens a lot more often than you think. In fact, it's a huge part of human sexuality and desire.

Now, if your mind tends to wander to interesting places, take a deep breath. You’re not a freak. Everyone does it. Fantasies are a perfectly normal way for our brains to process desire, whether they’re sweet, wild, romantic, or even a little bit naughty. So relax, it's just your mind doing its thing.

But what about that 3% who don’t fantasize? This is where it gets juicy. If you fall into that group, you might be wondering, “Is something wrong with me?” Nope, not at all. It’s just part of the wide spectrum of human sexuality. Think about it, some people are crazy into sports, while others just don’t care. The same goes for sexual fantasies. If you’re not wired for them, that’s totally fine. It doesn't mean anything's “wrong.” It just means your experience of sexuality is a little different from most people’s. There’s no “one size fits all” when it comes to desire.

Let’s keep it real for a second. Having sexual fantasies doesn’t mean you’re secretly longing for something outside your relationship or that you're not satisfied. A lot of fantasies are simply a safe space to explore desires, no harm, no foul. In fact, research shows that fantasizing can enhance your real sex life by making you more comfortable with your desires and helping you communicate them better to your partner.

So, the next time your mind starts to wander into fantasy land, don’t sweat it. It’s just your brain being... well, your brain. And if you're in that rare 3%, don’t worry. The beauty of human sexuality is how diverse it is.

At the end of the day, whether you're fantasizing every day or just not that into it, the most important thing is that you’re comfortable with your own desires. When it comes to sex, it’s all about finding what works for you, whether that means exploring fantasies, chatting with your partner, or just enjoying the moment. Whatever your style is, remember this: you’re never alone. And hey, that's pretty cool, right?